The Best of 2033

A final look at the year that will be with WEP Editor-In-chief Dave Bidini!

2033 was a quite a year. We were, at last, visited by an alien race  (LET US HERALD THE ARRIVAL OF THE SNOOFS) and, despite the election of Barron Trump to one of the world’s highest offices, pop music and pop culture remained unbowed. Here are a few of the records that caught WEP’s attention. 

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The Mandibles

“Cut Grass”

Top rank. Seething. Flavourful. Dumptruck green. Spurious. And verklempt.

Krazy Karl and his Supermarket Seven

“Prefab World”

Arching. Lilting. Lascivious. Lambent. And just a little oily!

Phoenicia Blue

“Carnival of Cats”

If Janis Ian married both Donovan and Phoebe Bridgers’ mom. Crusty and creepy. Perfect for long Volkswagen weekends. 

Hot Ham

“The Bringer of Mustard”

Like their 2030 offering, “Forked!” Hot Ham return with much of the same vibe (and that’s ok): thundering toms; alleycat bass; chocolate ripple guitars; wizard hat synths; and the melodic howling of singer Bert Bentelson. Recommended 50 and up.

Parvani

“Sandals of Fire”

Soap actor and Ty Seagull alumnus Parvani sallies forth with their third record, recorded almost entirely at sea. 

Champs to Chimps

“Glow Worm”

A strange album of 40s standards played almost entirely on Chapman Stick. Not great for your Reflux but excellent on lonely Tuesdays spent looking for old lovers in phone books with most of the pages torn out.

Carvehead

“Metal Magic Moment”

After their Budweiser Stage show this past summer, drummer Fleg told this writer that their new record would sound like what happens when “your mom’s SUV drives at top speed into a wallface of Burata cheese,” and turns out he’s not wrong. Squishy. Salty. And laden with fuzz wah.

miniminiminiminiminimini

“Shootin Fritos”

Dubbed “The World’s Jankiest Band,” miniminiminiminiminimini continue their lyrical odyssey of all of things suburban: skateparks, 711s, pro-life signage, bad highschool sex and big box parking lot culture. The band that America doesn’t need, but rather, has. 

Bore Eagle and Mountain Worm

“Guts”

This duo answer the question: “Can two folkies who went to college in the 2010s successfully a record a grindcore album in a zippered tent?”

flamflam

“Howdy Jesus”

More new country from America’s favourite redneck robots. Chosen act of most SNOOFS.

Pharrell Grillworthy

“Down to the Curb”

Breathy. Alien. Dynamo hum. 

Johnny Michael and the Canadian Playboys

“Hands off My Timbit”

While mostly pandering to ancient Freedom Convoyers and aging Proud Boys, Johnny Michael attempts to have his cake and eat it too, covering Joel Plaskett and Julie Doiron on this long player. Any good intentions however are struck down by typical (for him) offerings like “Not Free with Freeland!” and “Polli-love-re,” once again showing what side of the outhouse he lives on.

Patchwork Willie

“Hard Candy”

Favourites include: “My Gramma Loves Your Grandpa” and “Cherrycheesecake for Christmas.” Forgettables: “Jesus Can’t Roll J’s for Shit” and “Poophawk.” Those who get it, get it hard.

Bananatown

“Pomp and Scare-amony”

A Hallowe’en themed album from Pickering’s finest AI popsters. 

Miley Circus

“Metallic Breeze”

More instrumental tapestries from Perth’s finest, featuring guest appearances by Loreena Dog-Gone-it and Peter McGabriel. No animals were hurt in the recording of this album.

The Sheepdogs

“We're From Saskatchewan”

A blatant tourism brochure owing to titles such as “Nipping Down to Nipawin” and “Amorous in Aneroid,” this shameless Prairie acts rolls on under its own steam, although someone might check the treads for studs and leaks.